Person 2: Dishes who?
Person 1: Dishes a nice place you’ve got here!
What is fast, loud and crunchy?
A rocket chip!
What has ears but cannot hear?
Funny joke of the day
Two armed men decide to break a bank and take some hostages inside.
One of them asks the first extremely aggressive hostage:
– Tell me did you see me robbing this bank?
The hostess answers: – Yes.
Without much thought, the thief shoots him in the head, then asks the second hostage the same thing.
The second hostage responds:
– I didn’t see you sir, but I think my wife saw you!
Two old men sat on a bench and looked at passers-by. At one point a beautiful woman passes through their face. After five minutes, it goes again and again until one says:
– He sure dies for me.
– I do not think! Ha Ha Ha, but where do you know?
– Well don’t you see how young she is ?! He has no way of dying before me!
Dad joke of the day
Dad, why are you so bad?
Because I look better in that way
A man goes to the bank. The lady from the counter asks:
– What’s your name, sir?
– Jo-Jo-jo-hn Smi-Smi-Sm-ith.
– Are you having a discussion problem, sir?
– No, sir, my father had problems, and the clerk was an asshole and so he passed my name.
My best day it’s on a salary day
My worst day it’s the next day
Today I congratulated my mother-in-law on the occasion of her birthday. I hated to have part of everything she wants me to do, only as a double and I don’t understand why she was upset.