Blog

11 Jul

You are a lover of foods and you like to discover new foods, then you should know the most popular food puns.

 

  1. How long does it take to brew Chinese tea?

Oolong time.

 

  1. Did you hear the story about the angry waffle irons?

He just flipped.

 

  1. What do you call a sad raspberry?

A blueberry.

 

  1. Why can’t you trust tacos?

Because they tend to spill the beans.

 

  1. How did the cheddar profess his love?

“I don’t want to sound cheesy, but we go really gouda together.”

 

  1. Why does yogurt love going to the museum?

Because it’s cultured.

 

  1. What do you call a mac ‘n’ cheese that gets all up in your face?

To close for comfort food.

 

  1. What do you call blueberries playing the guitar?

A jam session.

 

  1. What did the waiter say when he dropped a hotdog?

It could always be wurst.

 

  1. Why can’t eggs tell jokes?

They’d crack each other up.

 

 

  1. What happens when you step on a grape?

It lets out a little wine.

 

  1. What do you call cheese that isn’t yours?

Nacho cheese.

 

  1. What do you say to a sad salad?

Don’t kale my vibe.

 

  1. What do you call an avocado that’s been blessed by the pope?

Holy Guacamole.

 

  1. What type of vegetable looks after the elderly?

The Carrot-aker.

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23 Oct

Dumbbells are a way for people to relax, to provoke a well-being of others, to amuse or relieve the atmosphere of a group and not only. However, during the complaint, I certainly encountered people who are not inclined to a funny, and when they said half, they created more nerves than smiles.
A good joke can change the situation and smile on the faces of many people in just a few minutes, but they can also have negative effects. A bad joke can cause less damage than you could imagine.’

1. Goes to a person
The jokes of a man within a group are the most dangerous and, as far as possible, should be avoided. The person to whom a joke is made may feel injured or annoyed if the joke feels bad.
We recommend avoiding such a diary and resorting to those that do not refer in any way to people around you.’

2. Intoning and how to say a joke
As I say, not all people are able to say half and more, not all of them can say half and make others like it. Tasting, gestures and how it is presented can very easily control, but at the same time a joke loses its effect if it is not as it should be.
I saw many people saying jokes, but they did not rejoin the smile.’

3. Political or religious gossip
The two topics are very sensitive, and if you have around people very faithful or supportive of a party, we recommend avoiding them, so do not get into the controversy.
Each dog is a certain opinion in terms of political organizations and religion, and a joke can stir more nerves than a smile.

4. Good guys in inappropriate moments
A joke is very good, if it is subject to a specific context. If you are in the church or in a setting that requires a certain attitude, it is not advisable to begin to tell the oath of others. Pay attention to these details in order not to give it to the bar.

5. Set a limit
Another mistake many people make is the limit of common sense that is often overcome. Each person has a degree of supportability regarding the jungle to their own person.
Be very careful in the jungle you say and to whom, because not every person has the sense of humor developed, and the overcoming of the common sense threshold can make his situation happen.

Pay attention to the 5 errors listed above and try to keep them in mind at all times. Cats jokes are said in a more pleasant way, in the context of care care allows for half the more their impact will be much greater.

Choose the best journalists and tell the others, and the smiles will surely appear on everyone’s faces!

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23 Oct

One of the largest supermarket chains in New Jersey is ShopRite and has operations across New York, Delaware, Connecticut and Maryland. The company was founded in 1951 as a small cooperative comprising eight independent grocers. Within a year, the grocery retailer has expanded to more than 50 members and has been operating larger stores, while creating its own private label products.

ShopRite has developed so much activity that the retailer is currently selling a wide range of food products. Selling anything from conventional goods and general merchandise to delicatessen and international foods, beverages, bakery products, pet food, home essentials and cleaning products among many others. It also offers a range of store services such as catering and pharmacy services also available online.

ShopRite Circular is the primary money saving opportunity, but the retailer also offers digital coupons and various online deals and promotions. The grocery retailer brand features both organic and imported products such as olive oil, pastas, pasta sauces, crackers, hazelnut spreads, sparkling juices, preserves and cheeses.

This supermarket chain is noted for its marketing strategy by trying to offer customers the products they need at the best prices. With a range of promotions, discounts, loyalty points, sales promotion campaigns, and other strategies, ShopRite manages to expand its customers’ reach and render them naturally and efficiently.

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23 Jul

The use and perception of the most stylistic devices requires a person who has a good knowledge of the language and a certain level of education. But there is also such a stylistic device for perception, and especially whose use requires erudition and ingenuity. These word games are a phenomenon existing in all European languages. Examples of pieces can be found in abundance in Shakespeare, in world literature, in poetry poems of the nineteenth century.

A word game based on ambiguity has generated deliberate or involuntary homonymy or sound similarity and causes the comic effect. At the same time, to make an impression, word games must be unknown in word games. It’s a special case of word games.

Despite the simplicity of the joke, she, dressed in a play of words, often acquires a touch of light irony with elements of philosophy. By grasping and understanding the game, it’s sometimes hard to tell why it was so funny. The point is that the game, from the point of view of linguistics, is a very complicated mechanism. The necessary elements of the word game mechanism are whole linguistic phenomena (homonymy, paronymia, polysemy). And, knowing the composition of a particular word, it is very difficult to analyze it. It is often difficult to determine the boundaries of a word game.

Did you like this riddles games?

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21 Jul

If you draw a collective portrait of our compatriots, relying on jokes, the image will prove ugly: dissidence, sadism, anti-semit, etc. But we are not afraid of this, but we are amused. Why do people say jokes? The answer is quite philosophical. A joke teaches us something and very simple things. And do not make it boring. About the first preachers did the same. Through a short and funny story, religious wisdom was transmitted more quickly and better.

To say a joke, it took some civic courage. And this courage unanimously revealed the whole of mankind. If at that moment someone had the idea of ​​doing something like a bargaining code of conduct for a man, regardless of the nation, the second element would include an honorable duty to say jokes. And the first place would be to believe in the ideals of the happenings.

For example, communism has fallen, but jokes have remained. The joke has had a very strong impact on the speech culture during the communist era. Even the usual conversation between people was often a joke, so it was not clear whether a person joked or talked seriously. The joke can receive classic quote status, worthy of daily use.

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19 Jul

The jokes about overweight people are brilliant. Because there are so many people who want to lose weight and fail to do anything about it, these people are teased with jokes that are funny.

We are confident that fat people get angry at jokes, but this will never stop.

Ex:

Your mother is so fat that she laughs with her lipstick.

 

Your mother is so fat that when he got on the scale he said, “Please, one by one!”

 

A fat boy goes into a fitness hall and asks the coach:

What is the best device to impress a girl?

Coach: – ATM.

 

– What month to marry, October or November?

– November, obviously!

– Why?

– You’re winning a month.

 

Two trainers discuss:

– Twenty years on end I dealt with the training of fleas. Now I went to the elephants.

– Why?

– I have a little trouble with my eyes

 

The psychiatrist draws a triangle and asks the patient:

– What does this drawing suggest?

– Empty women!

Then draw a circle:

– But what does that figure suggest?

– Empty women!

Draw a square:

– But this?

– Empty women!

– I see you have a fixed idea with naked women!

– I have a fixed idea? Who drew all these obscenities ?!

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19 Jul

Pick up lines have been used for a very long time, practically ever since the world, and they are part of the easiest way to hang a girl and convince her to say yes. Sometimes things make sense especially second time. People change, you change, and the universe is changing, and if we only keep up with the first chances, we will really lose some of the most beautiful moments and things in life.

Here are some of the most funny, successful pick up lines:
• Are you a magician? Because every time I look at you, everyone else disappears.
• I am not a photographer, but I can imagine myself and you together.
• I know you? Because you look alike with my girlfriend / boyfriend.
• It seems to me that I lost my phone. Could you call me?
• Are you sure you are not tired? You’ve been through my mind all day.
• Is there an airport nearby or took off my heart?
• There is only one thing I want to share about you, and this is your family name.
• Do you believe in love at first glance or do I have to go again?

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17 Jul

Diets are a taboo topic for those who want to lose weight,

it is all the more fun that there are many people starting certain diets,

but they do not manage to get them done because they are tempted to eat sweets or consume juices.

On the expense of dieters there are a lot of jokes that are delicious.

 

 

At school:

-What are the vegetarians, children?

Billy: Vegetarians are people who do not eat the animals but leave them without food.

 

2 friends said:

– Since I moved with my girlfriend, we’ve both decided to do the shopping one at a time. One day she, one day I, one day she, one day I … and so on.

– Cool. And what’s the difference?

– Well, one day we eat, one day we drink, one day we eat, one day we drink …

 

I was last night at a vegetarian restaurant, and before I leave I ask the waiter:

– How was the table, sir?

“Wonderful …” I replied. My Compliments to the gardener.

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15 Jul

Dark humor is unique in its style. If we normally hear funny jokes that do not offend anyone, black humor has sadistic, exaggerated jokes and can cause you a bad state.

Black humor is not for everyone, but it is funny but also shocking at the same time.

 

The director of a cemetery calls a representative of a motorcycle company:

– How many motorcycles have you sold in the last week?

– Five pieces.

– It means one is still walking …

 

Honeymoon ends, young wife complains to her mother:

– Mom, I already had the first serious family quarrel.

– Do not worry, my dear, this happens in any marriage.

– Yes mother, what about the body?

 

– What would Michael Jackson do now if he was alive?

– He would make a big hole to get out of the coffin.

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14 Jul

Chuck Norris is an action actor, and he has become a symbol in the world of cinema.

Being a lot of movies in which he has the lead role and in which he is the good boy and beating the bad guys on his own, Chuck Norris has become a subject for everyone’s jokes.

He created an image of an invincible man, which can also be seen from the following jokes:

Chuck Norris once hit a bearded horse. The descendants of that horse are now called giraffes.

 

Chuck Norris regularly donates blood to the red cross, but never his blood.

 

Chuck Norris once burned a forest when he experimented with water.

 

When Chuck Norris makes flotations, he does not get up, he pushes the ground down.

 

Chuck Norris is known for his modesty, but he admits it is the 8th wonder of the world.

 

A stone can crack in 2 or more. Chuck Norris was the only one who cracked 2 stones in one.

 

Chuck Norris beat Superman. It’s not known who won, but the loser had to wear the panties over the pants.

 

Chuck Norris drowned a fish under water.

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