Diet jokes

Let me tell you a sweet joke about dieting. I try a ketogenic diet based on natural food and good fats like avocado, nuts, cheese, seafood, and others. I end up with a few kilogram fats…


A friend tells me about the paleo diet. It’s about consuming foods in ancient age like raw fruits or lean protein, eggs and others. Also, I have not to consume processed foods like pizza, cake, hamburgers and others. What do you think? I kept 6 months diet and I have lost 6 grams because I have a sedentariness… So I think the problem is at me.


I kept a vegan diet for 3 months and this was also a joke… Because I eat more fruits that contain sugar and I gain weight 2 months.


If you want to not be a joke, dieting keep eat normal and exercise every day. Just take a long journey with your friends.

diet jokes


After a month of dieting, I lost 30 days.


I’m on a diet with seafood. I see food and I eat.


It’s hard to feed when your favorite exercise is chewing.


I have a condition that prevents me from going on a diet … it’s called “I’m hungry”.


Translated DIET means I ate that?


Food has never fattened me, but scales always do.


Funny diet jokes

I’m a light eater. As soon as the light comes on, I start eating.


I’m pretty sure I’m allergic to the diet. Every time I start eating food, I get sick.


I have tried a diet many times, but continue to fail every time I should eat.


Diet is not a piece of cake.


Diets are intended for fat and tired people.


I try to lose weight, but keep finding myself.


Garlic Diet: Do not lose weight; you just seem thinner from a distance.

diet jokes lose weight


I just seem to remember that I want to lose weight after eating 9 cakes.


Welcome to the weight loss forum.


To lose half a kilogram, double-click the mouse five million times.


Best diet jokes

I gave up jogging for health reasons.

The thighs were still rubbing, and my panties on fire.


Do not forget. You are what you eat….

I need to eat a weak person.


I’m on a diet with seafood. Every meal I see, I eat.


Ladies – Want to get rid of 5 kilos? Leave your purse.




What is your favorite exercise?



I want fat-sucked mosquitoes, not blood.

keto diet jokes



Calories (noun)

Small creatures that live in your closet and sew your clothes a little tighter each evening.


A weird new trend in the office. People who put names on food in the company’s fridge. Today I had a tuna sandwich named Kevin.


best diet jokes

“Your order, please.”

“3 hamburgers, 9 chicken melons and French fries XXL.”

“And a diet with coke.”


Easy to say diet jokes

Most people gain weight by taking intimate meals for only two … alone.

I try to lose weight, but keep finding myself.


You want to lose weight? Read vegan jokes. The laugh can help you to burn calories. 🙂


Start the diet now!

Many people have tried at least once in a diet to lose weight. They gave up their favorite food, changed the quantity, what they eat, and when they eat. Many of us have realized that although diets are good for health, it is not easy to keep one. If you want to help to resist your diet, why not try some diet jokes?


keto diet jokes


Mimi, what diet is now on the trend to lose weight?

“A very effective one, Lily: 40 Tik-Tak tablets for breakfast, 50 for lunch and 60 for dinner. The weight is constant, and you have a fresh breath. ”


Two women talk to each other. One of them says that the doctor recommended that he go daily on a horse to lose weight. The other one asks what the results are. She replies, “Well, the horse has already lost some weight.”


diet jokes


It is said that 2000 calories are burned during sex. That is why so many men have lost weight after they got married.

Two friends are talking to each other. One of them asks the other, “How did your wife manage to lose so much weight?” The man replied that he bought the clothes he didn’t even dream of, with only 2 smaller dimensions.


What do fat women say about themselves? That I love their thin legs, their tiny waist, but that I hate all the fat that hides everything.